Buried in the Back Pages

By Renee Tomcanin
February 28, 2002

A Fishy Situation

Garth Spacek, 42, of Madeira Beach, Fla., was stabbed in the abdomen with the detached bill of a swordfish after getting into a fight with another fisherman. Spacek began fighting with Frank Ashmus, 46, on the dock. The argument moved to Spacek’s apartment after he hit Ashmus on the head with a beer bottle and left the scene. Ashmus then followed and used the swordfish in retaliation.

Both men have been arrested and were held “without bond on charges of aggravated battery.” According to Pinellas County Sheriff spokeswoman Marianna Pasha, Spacek was in fair condition. Not surprisingly, both men were reported drunk.

From Yahoo! News

Iguana-Throwing. A new pub fad?

Susan Wallace, 47, was convicted on Monday of causing unnecessary suffering on her pet iguana, Igwig. Wallace flung Igwig twice at the doorman of The Anchor pub on the Isle of Wight. During the night, patrons of the pub had been subjected to Wallace placing her pet lizard on their shoulders and heads, and she had been asked to leave.

“She was extremely drunk,” officer David Harry said in an AP article.

Magistrate Sally Crocker will allow the iguana to stay with Wallace, who has indicated that she loves her pet dearly. Igwig is doing well in spite of his experience. Wallace faces six months in prison, a fine up to $7,150, a ban on keeping animals or all three.

From The Washington Post

Moosama Bin Laden

A 1,200-pound cow is on the lam. The Charolais cow escaped from a Cincinnati, Ohio slaughterhouse by jumping a six-foot fence. It has managed to evade police and officials the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. Going by the nicknames of Moosama Bin Laden, Charlene Mooken (a play on the name of Mayor Charlie Luken) and others, the cow has become a celebrity, being featured by local DJs, local television and even CNN. Luken plans to five the cow the key to the city when captured.

Businesses are also getting caught up in the cow craziness. Fifth Third Bank offered the cow a starring role in its next commercial. Fast-food chain Chick-Fil-A is offering 100 free chicken sandwiches to the lucky person who catches the cow. No matter how or when the cow is caught, Cincinnati has fallen in love with their bovine hero and wants to keep it off the hamburger bun.

From Cincinnati Post

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Renee Tomcanin

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