When I first found out I would be a commuter my freshman year of college, you can bet that I was hugely disappointed. As someone who thrives off of social interaction, it was a depressing idea that I would be stuck at home for possibly my entire college experience.
All of my friends were headed off to college. I watched them all leave to pursue new opportunities and new living arrangements while I was stuck exactly where I left off.
I felt alone.
As I entered my first day of school, I already felt entirely disconnected from most other students. It seemed that everyone had made their connections and friendships already and that I did not really have a place.
I spent most of my breaks either driving back home or roaming around Target. I would have sat in Jazzman’s and attempted to socialize, but I was always too shy to approach anyone and conjure up a conversation.
There was one saving grace that drove me out of my rut and that was the Communications LC. Considering I had multiple classes with these people, it was easier for me to grow closer with them and develop more of a connection.
Come winter break, I still was not feeling like I found a comfortable place for myself at Cabrini. I seriously considered transferring and felt as though Cabrini was just not the fit for me.
Then the second semester came and I vowed to give Cabrini a second chance. Boy, am I glad I did.
I decided I was already at a disadvantage by commuting, so I decided to try everything in my power to try to subvert the commuter stereotype. I increased my involvement in campus activities and worked on strengthening my connections with other students.
I joined stage crew, photography club, applied to be an orientation leader and generally tried to spend a lot more time on campus. Of course, I would not have been able to become as successful in my endeavors without the help of my three very best friends.
They taught me what true friendship really is and always treated me like any other college student, whether I was a resident or not. They always included me in activities and would even allow me to stay over whenever I was too tired to drive home.
One year later, people do not even realize I am a commuter. People come up to me all the time and say “you are a commuter? I could have swore you lived on campus.”
I now realize that the stereotype of being a commuter is irrelevant, as it does not matter if you are a residential student or not. You can be just as active, if not more active as a commuter if you simply keep finding different ways to get involved and put yourself out there.
You may not be able to find something that helps you to connect to people right away, but it is important to try a variety of different things and see what clicks.
Most importantly though, I have learned to not underestimate myself. I felt as though I was incapable of making friends last year and now I could not be more happy with the friendships I have made and the impact I have had on others, as well as the school.
I plan on living on campus in future years, but I could not be happier with my decision to commute these past two years. I felt as though it really taught me a lesson about being faced with certain adversities.
My college experience was in my hands the entire time and despite the fact that I was not able to experience college in its fullest potential firsthand, I still have had a terrific time at Cabrini by choosing my own path and finding myself along the way.
