The three things that will end a relationship are limitations, demands and expectations. This was the message of date doctor Dr. Jeff Kaplan’s presentation on healthy relationships.
Kaplan spoke to the students of Cabrini on Oct. 23 in the Grace Hall Atrium about the workings of a healthy relationship. Kaplan is a psychologist and the owner and founder of Interpersonal Growth Workshops, Inc. He was also the health education coordinator at Temple University.
Kaplan’s presentation was interactive with audience participation and the use of dry-erase boards and notes. His main focus was on how to solve and stop arguments from happening. He explained that an argument is when two people want to be heard at the same time.
“In the moment of an argument, that person is using the lower part of their brain,” Kaplan said. “There’s no way to use logic and ration in an argument.”
He explained the three steps to solve an argument: listen and identify the issue, separate the person and the issue and focus on solutions. Also, Kaplan said, “Don’t take things personally and don’t make it about yourself.” He said by following this advice, it will help transform your life.
Kaplan designed a Top 10 list on creating healthy relationships with your partner. He stressed that you should always ask yourself, “What is my role” in the relationship and to accept and appreciate your partner and yourself. He said, “When you know that you are whole without that other person, then you will make this relationship work.”