Keep in touch with friends

By Shannon King
April 25, 2002

It’s really a shame that people don’t keep in touch. Every stage of your life you have a certain group of friends who you would call your best friends. When you were little you even took the time to write their names in a circle on your notebook that said, “BFF” (Best Friends Forever.) Everyone knows that when you care about people you write their names in a circle because it goes on forever.

Well the group of friends you have in elementary school are just different when you get to high school and your idea of who you thought your best friend was changes drastically. You go through high school with a different group of people and at graduation, you promise to keep in touch. Some move on to colleges far away and others stay close to home. As the workload starts to grow heavier, it becomes harder and harder to keep in touch with high school friends. Your college roommates start to seem more like your family than friends, and slowly you start to replace that old group from high school one by one without even realizing it.

Our college years are a time to explore who we are and what we really want out of life. We probably party a little more than we should, but that’s what college is right? We grow up and learn that if we rely on one another every step forward is a little bit easier. I’m going to be a senior next year and I don’t want this trend to continue. I don’t want to graduate and only talk to the friends I’ve made at major events like weddings and funerals.

I recently went to a viewing and it was like a reunion party. Everyone seemed to be more interested in seeing old friends they haven’t seen in years than in the person that had passed away. I thought how sad it was that it takes a tragic event like a funeral to bring people together and start talking again. Why does it have to be like that?

I want to graduate and still know what my roommates are up to 10 years from now. I want to know what their kids names are, where they’re working and still go out with them after a long hard day for a couple of drinks. I never want to lose touch with people again and replace them with a new group. I realize that I will make new friends in whatever job I have, in the neighborhood wherever I plan to settle down and even with other parents of the kids on my future child’s baseball team. I’m not saying that I don’t want to have new friends, just that I don’t want to lose the ones I have now.

I never thought that my high school years would go by as quickly as they did or my senior year of college sneak up so fast. Now is the time when we are supposed to be looking ahead to what we want and I want my life to give me the courage to say, “I’m sorry,” or “I forgive you.” Too many friendships are thrown away because of petty differences and situations that could be easily solved with those simple phrases.

I have seen close relationships ripped apart by a fight so small that on any other day it might be overlooked or brushed off as a joke. In the future I plan on biting my tongue for 10 seconds before I say anything when I’m angry. It gives me time to think about what I’m going to say and I avoid saying things that I will have to apologize for later. In the heat of the moment, words can be a lot harsher than they were meant to sound.

If you are one of those people who still hang out with the friend you met in Kindergarten, I am happy for you. For the rest of you who are like me and lost touch with old friends, break that habit starting now. When out of the blue you think about someone you haven’t thought about in a long time, give them a call or write them a quick e-mail. Chances are, they are thinking about you too

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Shannon King

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